Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Rating Movies: The Smelmooo Way

It occurs to me that when I rate movies to friends, I don't generally give them a 1 or 2 or 3 or 4 star rating. I try to figure out what they like and adapt the rating to them. For example, Dawn of the Dead is a pretty good movie with some cool special effects, but if you aren't into fun horror movies then this might not be your type of movie.

How do you quantify your opinions like that?

To put it into perspective, I would give Lord of the Rings - The Return of the King the same rating I would to Ghostbusters. I think they are both completely perfect films, but for much different reasons.

I decided long ago to rate movies in a different manner -- one that suits my way of thinking and still applies actual worth to a film. You will see that the system is essentially a star system but it is more of a real world way of saying what I want to say and enables me to add caveats.

1. Full Price -- The movie was so good -- whatever kind of movie it was -- that I would recommend that you sneak out right now and see it... no matter what it costs. I would even say that if you had to go on a Friday night with everyone else in the world, it would be completely worth it for you. Full price is a big honor.

2. Matinee -- The movie is good. You should see it. You would like it, but I am not quite sure you would love it... so I don't want to be the guy that told you to go see a movie and made you pay full price... Matinees are always good to see... you see a movie and still feel like you saved a few bucks.

3. DVD -- DVDs on average come out 5-7 months after the movie was in the theaters. This level signifies that it was an ok movie, but if you miss it in the theaters, don't sweat it. DVD is good enough... especially in this world of Netflix when it won't cost you much to see it anyway.

4. Cable -- Movies almost always come out on cable one full year after they are released. It is really recommended that you wait that long to see this piece of drivel.

5. Regular TV -- They release stuff on regular television after removing all the bad words, violence and nudity, a few years after it comes out. Seriously... you can wait that long.

6. Ugh... (Self explanatory.)


1 Comments:

Blogger szg said...

I rate movies in a similar fashion, although once you get below the rental stage, there is no distinction for me. It is at that point that I say, "I am never getting those 2 hours of my life back."

Of course, there are movies that I have watched on cable that I never considered renting, but I would not recommend them....

5:15 PM  

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